Contrary to many Instagram posts, to me, self-love doesn’t mean running a bubble bath once a week with a bath bomb I definitely may or may not be able to afford. To me, realising that I already contain what I need for my own self-love was the biggest pivotal moment of all. This happiness and satisfaction of my accomplishments is the purest form of self-love. Sure, much like any other woman, some days I can look in the mirror and am really, really feeling myself and am so grateful for the life that I have. But let’s face it, on other days, the ‘off’ days, let’s just say it is a lot harder to see and believe these things. Self-doubt is a real doozy of a thing.
Now I know that being the ripe old age of twenty-five, I haven’t lived the longest or the most prosperous life, but to me, I’ve accomplished a lot of things. To me, falling in love with myself, my flaws, my personality, my life and what I have accomplished has been a long, drawn out and definitely a daunting process. I have travelled. I have loved. I have finished and re-started and almost re-finished studying. I have moved out and then back in and soon back out again. See, I have done these things. The reason I am so proud is that I’ve done these things on my own. To me, these accomplishments all contribute to my growing self-love and self-respect. I don’t want to come across up myself or egotistic but I genuinely love myself and you definitely should love yourself too.
To those who know me, I am naturally a very loud, positive and outgoing person. I will be your biggest supporter, advocate and confidante. I am constantly all for hearing new ideas and being a sounding board. So why is it when it comes to myself, I sometimes struggle? Sometimes is putting it delicately. Almost every time I have had an idea I internally shut it down because my self-worth has been so low. Only recently I recognised that this too is part of what self-love is. I listen to other peoples’ ideas and communicate with them on a positive and manifesting level but shun my own. Why? Because my self-love has been diminished previously. Once I realised that this was something I was automatically and subconsciously doing, it was A LOT of practice getting myself to stop. But I have stopped and my mental and physical health has improved tenfold. You see, self-doubt is and probably will always be one of my biggest hindrances. To everyone else, I was seen as this entrepreneurial ideas woman and to myself, all I saw (and sometimes still see) was a collective failure. Now this in no way shape or form is to be a pity party. I just want to highlight that everyone goes through things that shape themselves and we have to learn from this to ensure that we move ‘onwards and upwards’.
This self-growth and internal education is something that I am using as my motivation to better myself. I don’t strive to be better than anyone else. I strive to be better than who I was yesterday. Every day, I am learning. Every day, I am gaining an insight into the sort of woman I want to be. Ensuring that I nurture my happiness on a daily basis and being able to recognise when I may be suffering or have a decrease in my mood and happiness is of integral importance to me. And trust me, no-one wants an unhappy Erin. Absolutely no one. Not even me. My biggest tip of all is to be confident. Being confident in yourself and your ability. When you are confident in yourself you can achieve anything. Okay, maybe not anything but you definitely can achieve A LOT.
My top five tips for self-love
1. Keep a journal, either a physical book or notes in your phone. Record your daily adventures, this can be a keepsake momento to look back on and see all the amazing things you have achieved.
2. Find a hobby you enjoy and can do almost on the daily. For me, it is exercising. I find that by going to the gym daily I am releasing my daily stressors and also having a catch up session with many of my girlfriends.
3. If you don’t believe yourself, who can you trust? Talk to your best friend. Ask them their favourite things about you. You may be surprised by their responses.
4. “Treat yourself” is a lot more than a slogan saying from the movies. I treat myself at least once a week with a face mask, a hair treatment and a bath whilst reading my book. They may not be big things, but boy do they make me feel amazing.
5. Remember that you are human. We all have our good and our bad days. Next time, try and think, “if this was my friend, would I let them talk to themselves like this?”. The answer is blatantly obvious isn’t it? So go easy on yourself.
To channel my inner ‘Year Seven self' definitely, Dream, Believe, Achieve. Self-doubt can be a real jerk but trust me, you have the power within yourself to overcome it. I am a big believer in the power of positive thinking and loving yourself. If you ever need that pep talk from someone other than yourself; I am only a DM, an email or a phone call away.
Be happy. Be unapologetically happy within yourself about your life, your accomplishments and your goals. In the wise words of a certain Canadian crooner; you should go and love yourself. Don’t ever forget that.
Here if you need. Love (yourself) always,
GUEST CONTRIBUTOR // ERIN GREEN
I am a self-proclaimed lover of life. Being in my mid-twenties I am aware of many of the challenges that many women in similar situations to me face. By utilising my platforms, I have open discussions with people about their health and wellbeing albeit mental, physical, and emotional and talk about topics which are sometimes a little bit too hard to broach themselves. Also, I share stories about my life in a way that hopefully empowers others to feel that they too are not alone in this lil old adventure we call life. E x